I am not sure what to write about tonight, I just feel like writing. It has been a good week. You know what actually it has been a great week. I love it when family is around. I feel like I am in one of those very positive TV sitcoms like the Cosby show where the generations come together to laugh and play and soak up the love that only the presence of family can bring.

No where else in my life or in my day is the feeling of being loved so present as those moments when I am surrounded by family. To me these moments are as close to perfection that life has to offer.

This week I was deeply saddened to send a young 15 year old patient of mine to Lucille Packard Children’s Hospital… Alone. Alone in a cold dark and lonely place he sat, stoic and in intense pain, resolute and calm not truly aware of the circumstances that surrounded this fateful diagnosis. He came to me that morning, he left later that night.. a 15 year old with a large necrotic tumor having taken hostage a young man’s leg.

How I feel pain and torment for this poor childs soul. An immigrants life, alone, 15 no parents, no family, only the cold metallic bars of a lifeless stretcher in which to cradle his youthful frame. Stone faced, made stone by a life of difficulty, yet inside within the depth of his soul I see, or actually I feel his fear.

It chills me to the bone.

I sleep tonight thinking of this young boy. How I wish I could hold him in my arms, comfort him as I comfort my own son, wipe his tears, and in such acts let him know everything will be OK.